About Skills
💔 Set a world record for “Fastest Time to Lose an Argument and Block the Winner.”
Skills is a man of many talents — none of which are useful in real life. He’s dedicated his existence to perfecting the art of arguing with strangers on Discord, often mistaking yelling into his mic for ‘winning.’
Despite spending 14 hours a day gaming, Skills has yet to unlock the ‘Common Sense’ achievement.
Rumored to be the only person in Discord history to lose an argument and still type ‘W’ in chat.
Once tried to 'flex' by bragging about his internet speed — during a voice chat that was lagging.
Despite being ‘too cool’ for a job, Skills has impressively managed to turn unemployment into a full-time hobby.
Famous for turning every conversation into a monologue about how rich and powerful he is — yet spends every night alone, wondering why no one actually likes him.
Skills' Daily Schedule
- 🕘 10 AM – Wake up, rage post in Discord.
- 🕒 3 PM – Yell at strangers online while claiming he's "too busy for this shit."
- 🕔 5 PM – Attempt to sound alpha in voice chat, get muted immediately.
- 🕘 9 PM – Flex imaginary wealth before asking his mom for dinner.
- 🕚 11 PM – Fail to sleep because he's still replaying arguments he lost hours ago.
Alphaskills' Dating Profile
Username: AlphaSkills (because "Skills" wasn't enough)
Age: 25 (but acts 12)
Hobbies: Losing arguments, typing in all caps, and flexing imaginary wealth.
Turn-ons: Internet points, pretending he's better than everyone else.
Turn-offs: Personal growth, responsibility, and anyone who has a real job.
Dealbreaker: Must be OK with him being fat. He calls it "bulking."
Achievements
- 🏅 Fastest Time to Threaten Someone in a Voice Chat
- 🎖️ Grandmaster of Empty Flexes
- 🥇 Record Holder for "Most Energy Spent on Internet Rage"
- 🍆 Certified Owner of the World's Smallest Penis (Self-Proclaimed)